Thursday, December 31, 2009

You do win friends with salad.

But not just any salad. Christmas Salad. This is the healthiest thing to ever appear in Vice.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

In Case You Just Can't Get Enough of Me

I made a Tumblr. It contains my important thoughts and feelings on a wide variety of topics. Let's be Internet friends.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

I'm Reading At Happy Ending This Friday

October 2, 7:30-8:30
The final Quickies, in which readers have 6 minutes to wow the audience. Featuring Mark Becker, John Bredin, Jamie Peck, Deb Victoroff, and Diana Vilibert. Hosted by Rachel Kramer Bussel(Bottoms Up, Spanked, The Mile High Club). Free cupcakes from Baked by Melissa. 
(B/D to Grand, J/M/Z to Bowery, F to Delancey or F/V to 2nd Avenue,
Between Forsyth & Eldridge. Look for the hot pink awning that says "XIE HE Health Club."
Admission: Free, 21+ only
Happy Ending Lounge: 212-334-9676

Come LOL with and/or at me.

The Phenomenal Handclap Band...Get Into It

What's the sound of four hands clapping?

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Bash Compactor: Air Sex World Championships

Air sex is like air guitar, but instead of playing an imaginary guitar, you're fucking your imaginary friend. It was actually v. entertaining. Warning: man ass content.

Viceland Blog

I just realized I've never posted any of the things I've written for the Vice blog in here. Why not? After all, as Lesley Arfin once said, Vice is The Fonz of magazines. I guess I was kind of scared my family might find some of the scandalous things I've written and call me up to verify I'm not a virgin anymore or something. I also don't want them knowing what a cynical fuck I've become. But the older I get, the less I care about these matters. Here are a few articles I've written for Fonzie.

Monday, June 8, 2009

Blank Dogs Feature

This guy makes weird, good, post punk-ish music all by his lonesome. He also runs a record label and hangs around at shows listening for new music he might like while chewing gum and generally being awesome. 

Sunday, May 31, 2009

Bash Compactor: Eternal Cool

I collaborated with my friend/colleague Matt Harvey on my B.C. piece this turned out to be a lot more fun than going to a party alone. Who knew?

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Bash Compactor: Who's the Boss?

Making a Monkey Out of Mike Edison
(and Jon Spencer and Christina Martinez and myself, OMG)

Friday, May 15, 2009

Bash Compactor: Awkward Times With Vampire Weekend

It's awkward when you're assigned to cover a party thrown for people you kinda sorta knew in college but weren't really friends with. Fortunately, awkward usually leads to funny.

Bash Compactor: Susanne Bartsch's Vandam Party

Trannies are the best people ever to party with but they hate the goddamn devil sun.

Bash Compactor: Burning Angel Party

This party was a lot more fun than I thought it would be, and I think I got hollered at by DJ Jess.

Bash Compactor: America Takes Williamsburg

Can you spot the hipster grifter at this rad photo show?

Passing the Bar: Alligator Lounge

Alligator Lounge took over Lost and Found and the results were passable.

I.U.D. Feature

I.U.D. is Lizzie Bougatsos from Gang Gang Dance and Sadie Laska from Growing. They are amazingly creative and talented people and they got me drunk on fancy wine during the interview, which is always a plus.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Michael Pitt Has a Band

They sound a lot like Nirvana. Like, a LOT. There are worse bands to sound like. 

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Boys! Boys! Boys!

This article came out in the NY Press's about the art/culture/cock site East Village Boys. Read it and tell me what you think.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Lykke Li at Webster Hall

It wasn't as awesome as I'd hoped it would be, but I still found myself decently entertained.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Bar Review of Ella

This new spot in the East Vilage is cute, but can never take the place of Boysroom in my heart.

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

I Have a DJ Gig!

Soda Bar
629 Vanderbilt Ave.
Friday 1/23/09

This bar has the feel of a '50s era soda fountain, and they serve food, too! I will most likely be goth-ing the place up with heartbreaking '80s pop and bands that sound like heartbreaking '80s pop.

Monday, January 12, 2009

Sometimes I Take Pictures

Polaroids, anyway. These are making me really nostalgic for the tour I did with Impose last spring, despite how utterly insane it was.

NY Press Articles

I've been writing a lot for the NY Press lately. My editor, the spectacular Adam Rathe, is just a mensch. I hope he joins a punk band again someday and calls himself Adam Wrath, because that would be awesome.

WNYC Singles Night Was a Bust

But I wrote a funny article about it for The L Magazine: